...the end of book two.

I'm finishing the book of Exodus a different person then when I began. 

Before, Exodus was the book that would bring to a screeching halt, my New Year's resolution to "read my entire bible in a year". It was the book that went on and on and on about the same ol' thing.  It was a book of a far away God that seemed nothing like the Jesus I knew.

It was book that didn't apply to me.

In my quest to "journal through my bible" in hopes of finding out more about God and why He loves me so much (instead of taking everyone's word for it)  I knew I must trudge through Exodus, reminding myself that it's at least better than Leviticus and Numbers.  *Sigh*  I can't wait to get to the good stuff.  Bring on the Psalms.  Bring on the New Testament. 

What surprised me was that Exodus had transformed before my very eyes into a book filled with comfort, advise, encouragement and most of all it gave me what I am craving most - a glimpse of God.

Exodus changed me.  I've been a Christian since I was 12 years old (I'm now 30 something) and I've always tried sooo hard to please God so He'll love me more, or worse, feeling at the end of the day like I did nothing but disappoint him and made Him love me less.   I knew that wasn't true, at least I've been told that many times - through people, books...songs.  But I didn't get it.  You know?  It just didn't click.

Exodus was a light switch.  Seeing the way God responded to His people (that often reminded me of...me) made me realize that God loved them so, so much, just because.  He never gave up on them, never turned His back.  God loved them.  God loves us.  God. loves. me.   Light switch *click*   

He desperately wants me to love Him back.  He desperately wants to bless me, He wants to be my friend - He's passionate about me!!! 

BUT - He's still God.  And because He's God, He can not let sin go unpunished and THAT is why He made a way out for us.  That's why He sent Jesus. 

...and I'm soooooo glad He did because I really don't know if I could have offered animal sacrifices on a regular basis!  Yuck!  Ew!  Thank God, I don't have to find out!! 

Exodus isn't a boring ol' Testament book with a sole purpose of giving us rules and making us thankful we don't have to partake in animal sacrifice. 

It's a building block, a link, to the New Testament, the Gospel -God's perfect plan of Salvation and I can't wait to read it again.

A good friend, indeed!

Exodus 31 - 40

These closing chapters taught me even more about God's character and His relationship to me.

First, in Chapter 31 - I love how He talks about the gifts He's given people.  It says, "I have...given him great wisdom and skill in all kinds of crafts."  (vs 3) and "I have given special skill to all naturally talented craftsmen."     

Can you imagine being able to give someone a skill?  I've been pretty excited to give people gifts, to the point that I can hardly wait for them to open them!  Especially when I make a homemade gift.  But really, we're talking scrapbooks and hand wash from Bath and Body Works, here.  I can't even begin to imagine what it would be like to point at someone and say..."I hear by give you the gift to sing songs like angels!"  Bam!  What power!!  

I just think it's awesome, and it shows how big God is.  He has a plan and He created and gifted everyone of us in a certain way to carry out His plan.  I just think that is so cool.

Another thing about God.  He changes His mind.  Moses asked Him to change His mind about His plans and God did!  (32:12-14) Good to know.

Later in that same chapter, He gets the Levites to kill those who "didn't go on the Lord's side."  What the heck?  Must say, having a hard time with that one.  I don't understand why God would do that.  I know He wants us to love Him above all else but I've always understood that there will be a time and place for judgement.  And making brother kill brother?  Father turn against son?  Ugh.  Three thousand were killed that day.  I know I may never understand why, I just have to trust that God had a reason.   

And really, when it comes right down it - He's God, and I'm not.  He doesn't have to explain anything to me.  That's where faith comes in, and trusting that God never gives us second best. 

Ok, this next verse is so funny to me.  I'm sure it wasn't funny to God, but it shows me a side of Him that sounds just like a parent.

 "...but I will not travel along with you.  If I did, I would be tempted to destroy you along the way."
 - Exodus 33:3

Ha!  Actually, I quite enjoy travelling with my kids but I have had the "pleasure" of travelling with other families and I quite understand God's frustration with them.  I'm sure he feels the same way with His children today...and with me.

He was faithful with them time and time again.  They complained, doubted, sinned and even made a new "god" to worship!  ...and yet He still wanted to keep His promise - to give them this wonderful land - flowing with milk and honey. 

He just couldn't bring Himself to travel along with them, or He might kill them!  Totally understandable. 

A few other verses that gave me more "peaks" into God's heart and how He feels about me.

33:14 - "I will personally go with you, I will give give you rest - everything will be fine for you."

33:17 - "....you are my friend."

34:14 - "for He is a God who is passionate about His relationship with you."

I always knew God loved me but it really feels awesome to hear Him say, "you are my friend and I am passionate about you."  

Not only that but He has the power to "give me rest and make everything fine!"

Now THAT'S a good friend to have!!

  

What? Only 4 per customer??

Exodus 16 - 31

Ugh!  So. many. rules.  What is it about about rules?  It doesn't really matter how old you are, rules just stink!! (Well most, anyway...)

When you're young, it's "make your bed, brush your teeth."

In high school it's "be home by 10:30, do your homework". 

Even now, I'm almost 40 and I hate to hear, "only 4 per customer".  I mean really!! 

I've heard many "rumors" about ALL the commands and laws in the Old Testament and I must admit I've never taken the time to actually read them. 

Oh, I've started many times...but then I wake up the next morning with my bible resting comfortably on my chest and a "crooked glasses" imprint on my face.

Of course, I've read the Ten Commandments.  Even memorized them as a kid - but they're just "old testament."  Aren't they?  Jesus came to "replace" old law.  Didn't he?

Jesus often referred to the commandments, even going so far as to suggest we go beyond - making them, not only "action" rules, but matters of the heart. 

"Don't commit adultery".  Jesus took it a step further.  "Don't even look at another woman with lust."  

Makes sense, really.  I mean why would I expect God to bless my marriage, if I'm not honouring it with my whole heart? 

God wants to do awesome stuff in our lives but we have to do our part too.

But...uh...I keep - well...kind of, try to, keep, the commandments.  Let's see, I certainly don't murder!  I haven't committed adultery.  I don't steal...much.  Hmmm...what have I stolen in the past month?  Year?  I just keep forgetting to put that dollar back in the cash box, I just never seem to have one on me at the right time. 

Hmmmm...what about stealing time?  How often do I surf the net at work?  How many times a day do I check facebook at work?  and if my boss doesn't mind, why do I turn it off as he walks by?  

What about coveting?  Uh...I'm not even going there.  Let's just say I try to be happy when my friend gets a new hot tub in her back yard or my sister's husband makes breakfast in bed for her for the third time this week!  Yeah.  Guess I'm still working on that one.

Do I keep the Sabbath holy?  Thinking back on the last four Sundays...did I even rest for 5 minutes?  Besides church...what makes my Sunday stand out from the rest of the week? 

Moving on down the list...oh good, here's one!  I would NEVER worship Buddha or melt all my gold and make an idol shaped as a calf.  Imagine!  Nope!  No idols for me!!  Hmmmm...if someone were to observe me for a day, what would they see as my "god"?  Facebook?  A clean house? A great blog?

God gave us commands for a reason.  

They protect us, profit us.  We often think about rules as something that takes away our freedom, however when we follow rules, commands or laws - it actually make us free. 

Think about society for a second, the same is true.  If we break the law - we lose our freedom.  Alternatively, when we follow the law, we remain free!  

So, reading on, past the "Ten Commandments" passage God continues listing a ton of rules and ceremonies.  Rules that I can barely read through, let along follow.  I believe they made a lot of sense at the time.  I'm sure there was a reason and purpose behind each of them.  Especially the one about not boiling a young goat in its mother's milk.  Seriously, have you ever wondered what their reaction was?  "Aw, man!  It's just NOT going to taste the same if I don't boil my young goat in it's mother's milk! No fair!  Well...there goes supper."  (I may have to look into that command...see if I can find the history behind it.  Weird.)  

But the commandments are different, somehow.  The other laws He gave to Moses to pass on.  However God, Himself, spoke to the people concerning the commandments.  "These are the big ones", He was saying.  "The ones I really want you to get."  He didn't want to chance anyone getting them messed up through mis-communication.  

And really when I think about it, they're not unreasonable. You know?  If we could look at them from God's point of view, "Come on, guys, don't kill each other.  It's not nice.  And really, you need a day to rest so you can be your best heading into a new week.  While your at it, stay true to your wife.  Trust me when I say if you cheat on her your entire family will be broken."  

They only make sense. 

Sure, I believe that Jesus came to be the final sacrifice so we didn't have to kill stuff anymore to say sorry to God....or to thank God....or to worship God.  But at what point did we decide it was OK to take something that wasn't ours?  To long for a house or car like our neighbors?  Or to misuse the name of the Lord?  

From this day forward, I will no longer look at the commandments as "old testament" or "something I memorized in Sunday school" but I will recognize them as words so important to my God that He spoke them His very self to His chosen people.

...and had Moses transcribe them in stone.  Twice.

What kind of love?

Exodus 14-15

"Don't be afraid!  Just stand where you are and let the Lord rescue you."  - Ex 14:13 (Moses talking to the Israelites as Pharaoh's chariots are approaching)

Love it!!  Why am I always convinced that God is going to turn away from me or give me the "silent" treatment because I do something wrong, complain or doubt Him? 

Look at the Israelites!!  They were the "journeymen" of complainers and doubters!!  If you want to learn how to complain properly (if there is such a thing...and if it doesn't just come naturally to you as it does me...), just read the book of Exodus!  They are like a bunch of teenagers!  (Trust me, I live with one...I know!) 

...and yet time and time again, God was faithful to them. 

When I am I going to get it through my head that God loves me not because of something I've done or haven't done....but because of who He is?   He CAN'T not love me! 

No. matter. what. 

After He parted the Red Sea for a convenient escape, the Israelites sang a celebratory song proclaiming who He was and what He did.  (Chapter 15)

I always used to pass by these parts of my bible,  I have no idea why.  Now, I always use them to make lists.  I love making lists. 

When I begin to doubt that God can and will come through for me, I need to renew my mind with the truths from their song:

The Lord is:

• My victory
• My strength and my song
• A warrior
• Glorious in power
• Great and majestic
• Glorious and holy
• Awesome in splendor
• Unfailing love.

His actions:

• He has triumphed gloriously
• He has thrown horse and rider into the sea
• He has thrown Pharaoh's chariots and armies into the sea
• He dashed the enemy to pieces
• He overthrew those who rose against Him
• His anger flashed forth and consumed enemies like fire
• At the blast of His breath, waters piled up.
• He performs wonders
• He raised His hand and the earth swallowed our enemies
• He leads and guides His people
• He silences enemies, He melts them with fear and terror - dread overcomes them
• He plants His people on His mountain, to the place where His holiness dwells

THIS is who HE is and what HE does for His complaining, doubtful, and ungrateful children! 

What kind of love is this??   Certainly one that I want to receive more of.

...and give more of.

Free will? Really?

Exodus Chapters 7-13

 

I've read these chapters many times.  We all know the story.  God releases plague after plague on Egypt until Pharaoh agrees to free the Israelites.

 

It's funny how you look at a story in a completely different way when you are journaling it.  I found myself underlining verses I've never even noticed before.  I began to questions God's plan.  I mean, He's God, right?  He could have struck Pharaoh dead.  Why did he chose to demonstrate His supremacy by sending disturbing plagues on all of Egypt?

 

Especially the last one!  The death of the firstborn in EVERY family.  

 

The thin that I found most difficult was understanding why He would "harden Pharaoh's heart" only to release more devastation on the people of Egypt.

 

To be completely honest, I felt as though it was a power trip.  

 

But as I continued reading I realized that God was using the opportunity for the people of Egypt to fully understand that HE is Lord.  I think at the same time, He was showing Israel that they could trust Him by protecting them from the plagues.

 

God said, (about the Egyptians)

 

"When I show them my power...they will realize that I am the Lord." - Exodus 14:18

 

"This will give me the chance to do even more miracles."

 - Exodus 11:9 (after Pharaoh refuses one again)

 

I understand now.  I know the plagues had to be awful and they had to get worse each time in order for the people, and Pharaoh to realize it was God behind them.  Many of the plagues were "copied" by the magicians.  I guess they believed if they could simulate the plagues, the would preserve their credibility and deny that God was "all powerful".  

 

The plagues showed that God wasn't just the God of the Hebrews but was supreme over the Egyptians' very lives.  The plagues were all about who had the power...

 

Clearly the Egyptians deities (and rulers) did not.

 

Like I already said, I do understand that now.  But what I don't understand is why God hardened Pharaoh's heart.  It's one thing to pick or used someone who is stubborn to complete God's will (or plan) but I have a hard time hearing the word say,

 

"God hardened Pharaoh's heart."  - Exodus 10:20 

 

Doesn't that remove free will?  Does he harden the hearts of my unbelieving friends and family? 

 

Alternatively, does he soften hearts? 

 

...and more importantly, will he soften the hearts of my unbelieving friends and family?  

 

 

 

Whatever is available

"Now go and do as I have told you. I will help you speak well, and I will tell you what to say."
- Exodus 4:12


Today, I'm claiming that verse as a promise!  Moses was convinced that he was of no use to God becuase he couldn't speak well. Patiently, God told him that HE could use "whatever is available" to accomplish His plan and fulfill His promise.

If I make myself available, even if/when I don't feel adequate - God can and will use me.

I studied the book, "Secrets of the Vine", in my small group this fall - the passage from John 15 - and so I've been trying to find ways to make a difference in someone's life everyday. This "old testament" passage (quoted above, Ex 4:12), words that God spoke thousands of years previous, encourages me as I read my Saviour's words, "bear much fruit", on the eve of His death.


In John 15, when Jesus tells his diciples to "bear fruit" he's saying that God wants to reach, bless, save, meet the needs of everyone around me - to bring Himself glory!



There are many days I can barely meet my own needs, let alone feel adequate enough to meet the urgent needs of those living in hurt and fear around me. But, in Exodus, Chapter 4 - God reminded me that it's not by my power! He's going to use "whatever" is available!! That's me!! ...if I'm willing.

Lord, give me the will, strength and boldness to always be willing.

I'm pretty sure God's not recruiting me to lead a nation out of bondage, like Moses, but He definitely wants to show what He can accomplish though me. He'll "help me speak well" and "tell me what to say".
 It's so neat how God, once more, connects the Old and New Testemant -words spoken 1000's of years apart come alive and come together in new ways every time I read them.

And they mean so many different things too, depending on the context in which I am reading them, given the situation I am in or an issue I am dealing with at the time - God's word can mean something to me one day and the very next day, the exact same verse can be understood differently. 



..and each time it touches and teaches me in a whole new way.


I guess that's why it's called "The Living Word".